Looking to invest.

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For the best returns you can’t beat infrastructure. GOLD!

There’s been quite a flurry of excitement on the investment scene with uncertainty as to whether the housing market, (the gold standard for the Australian economy) is about to go Pop. We at pcbycp have numerous investments and have watched with some satisfaction our capital grow. And tellingly we felt the housing market was unstable years ago, and deferred our funds from ‘fools gold’ into the much safer realm of publicly funded infrastructure investment. We like Public/Private partnerships, The public doesn’t get a look-in, and we claim confidentiality whenever a troublemaker tries to gain access to the fine print. Cos there is none.

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Ian Narev. CEO Commonwealth bank. Demonstrates, “the trickle down effect”

That’s why we were bitterly disappointed with the Andrew’s government kiboshing the East Link, we stood to make billions, and in the end had to settle for a mere hundred million when the State Government , (the taxpayer) compensated us for not going ahead. Clearly the Andrews government doesn’t understand how investment and money markets work. Whereas, up north in New South Wales and Queensland we’ve been raking it in. Australian Water Holdings was a good little earner, and Arthur, (artful arty to his mates) put us onto West-link, the Eastern Distributor, the M5 and the Westconnex M4. We’ve done spectacularly well. In Sydney you only have to hum the opening bars to “We’re in the money”, and the pollies throw cash at you. No questions asked, no due diligence, and every project comes with a lifelong guarantee.

But we’re a bit cross. Seems that there’s better money to be made in banking. And we should’ve figured that out years ago when Anna Bligh got on board as spokesperson for the banking industry. That’s what comes when you’ve got a monopoly. Should’ve listened to Rupert, no matter how much you’re making off government contracts you’ve gotta keep your eye on the next big thing. There’s still money to be made in the private sector.

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Anna Bligh. (Bank Suck-hole). Demonstrates the trickle down effect.

So to our utter disappointment we found out that the Commonwealth Bank, which we forgot was guaranteed by the Federal Government (the taxpayers) is the ‘numero uno’ for money laundering. Why didn’t we think of that? Turns out the Commonwealth Bank is the destination of first preference for dodgy funds. You can open up an account in any name: ‘The three men deposited about $3.6 million across 427 separate transactions. They made dozens of deposited amounts under $10,000 at Commonwealth branches scattered across Sydney to avoid scrutiny. The bank accounts were held in fake names such as Ronald Brown, Luke Shaw and Richard Whippy’. (ABC News)

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Mr Whippy owned this van.

We loved Mr Whippy, and apparently on all the accounts the same photo appeared as identification. Cos he had shitloads of money, that was all the Commonwealth Bank needed. And that just goes to show that the Commonwealth are good sports. They didn’t check drivers licenses, passport details, gas bills, the bank statements, Nuffink. And why should they. Anna reckons the banks are doing fine, and if we the public left em to do their job, it’d reassure investors the world over that the banks are doing their bit to advance the pillar of western economies, ‘the trickle down effect’.

And when one of the syndicate was asked why he chose the Commonwealth Bank, he proclaimed it the bank of first choice. That’s competition at work. So leave Anna alone, as an ex politician she knows that the buck stops here. And there, and over there, and round the corner… and in 100’s preferably.

In brown paper bags would be nice.

Not in one big flood though, that would be too obvious.

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The Commonwealth Bank gives favourable treatment to syndicates. No questions asked, easy terms.

Just a trickle would suffice.