Acting PM reflects on Australia’s greatest ‘EVER’ P.M

Dear reader, just in case you missed it, we sat down after dinner last night and watched Australia’s, second longest (‘greatest’) serving Prime Minister (EVER) sit down and tell us about his love for the longest serving, arguably greatest Prime Minister ‘EVER’ for an hour. It was reverential and I couldn’t help but shed a tear, as we wandered back to that safer age of Commies, World War and Ben Chifley’s cigars. And…… this is the best part, there’s another hour of the second best Prime Minister EVER, reminiscing about the Greatest Prime Minister ‘EVER’, next Sunday.

For Sunday is the day of worship.

John and Rupert, Saving the world from democracy.

And for the first time if you’ve ever wondered, John W Howard, (Second Greatest P.M EVER) almost cried when he described the responsibility attendant upon weighing in on the invasion of Iraq and Afghanistan. He likened it to the responsibility RG Menzies, (Greatest Prime Minster ‘EVER’) would have felt when he described his ‘melancholic duty to fight for Empire’ as a consequence of the invasion of Poland.

Arguably. ‘Second and Third BEST’ P.M’s, glory in Ming’s shadow.

For the history enthusiast, the gravitas was palpable. Of course Ming, must have felt just like John. There was Germany, mighty, unstoppable and evil, crushing the defence-less new democracy in Eastern Europe. And here was us. Poised as a democracy to destroy the evil dictatorship of Sadaam Hussein, and what was left of Afghanistan, after the Russians and (prior to that) the Empire had smashed it to bits. And (this is the bit I’ll look forward to hearing next week) John might tell us how we justified our latest war. I can understand that things got pretty serious when Ming realised that we were gonna be on our own when Japan did a bit of territorial expansion, and it was a quick thing that the Yanks saved us from oblivion. But what John failed to mention, (and i’m sure this’ll come in next weeks installment), is how we (the glorious Allies) all got together and reconstructed Germany. I’m sure he’ll describe the Marshall Plan, and I’m pretty sure he George and Tony, had one for Iraq. That was the funny part. Five years after we’d crushed the might of Nazi-dom and the evil of fascism, we’d chipped in and the German economy was going gang-busters. Whilst, and this is the irony, whilst we were still on rationing, petrol coupons and postwar austerity.

Thats the bit that I’m looking forward to seeing. Even more-so than those glorious moments when John described the Queen anointing Australia in 1954. I love the Queen. I love being part of the Commonwealth, ( Empire). But I’m so looking forward to John describing the visionary plan he shared with Tony, George and himself to rescue the Iraqi’s and Afghani’s, from servitude, and how we, (the gallant allies) respected the culture and people we rescued.

The Sherriff and his deputy. Saving Iraq, Afghanistan and ” Canadia” from oppression.

I’m also looking forward to how John describes the Intervention. Another instance of how he rescued the wretched, dispossessed, wasteland of aboriginal Australia. John, like Ming was a big leader, and though we got an inkling from Rupert, Gerard, Malcolm and Alexander, just how great a man he was as second longest serving P.M, he acknowledged almost tearily that nothing comes close to Ming. And that is why Australia is the progressive, liberal, tolerant country we are now. Ming’s legacy.

As Barry Humphries so nobly put it, “ I still consider Bob Menzies the leader”. And he’s quite right. It’s reassuring to know that after all these years, nothing’s changed.