Supreme Court of Victoria.

Fascinating news from the legal profession. The Solicitor-General Stephen Donaghue, QC, representing Health Minister Greg Hunt, Human Services Minister Alan Tudge and Assistant ­Treasurer Michael Sukkar, told a packed Supreme Court; ‘that the Ministers regret their statements, but will not apologise for them’.

We cant blame them. The Ministers were confused. They believed that the highest court in the land was not the Supreme Court, nor the High Court, but the Australian.

The three ministers

The Australian did, after the inevitability of serious criminal charges offered a full apology. But the Ministers would not retract their accusation that the Victorian judiciary were conducting “ideological experiments”, and “divorced from reality”. In light of so called “ lenient “ sentences handed out to would-be terrorists. The two terrorists are adolescents. One would think terms of five seven years would be enough for being stupid. And we cannot comment on the “stupidity” of sending them to jail to make them “ better” terrorists.

So the Court has deferred a judgement and we wait in stunned silence to see whether the Ministers will go all the way and repudiate the ancient principle of separation of powers. Bit like the ancient principle of the separation of church and state. Bit like the ‘No means No’, which part of the ‘No’ don’t they understand?

Helpfully from Sydney Criminal Lawyers comes this useful advice for those about to front the bench.

Over the portal of the Victorian Supreme Court. An inspiration to Minsters who read from the “book of Murdoch”

WE suggest the Minsters, follow the instructions very carefully. They are lawyers, but not all lawyers are so good at comprehension. It makes them more human. We’ve added supplementary, commentary in italics.

‘Writing a letter of apology can help persuade the court to treat you more leniently when you are being sentenced for a criminal or traffic offence, (or just being stupid)
A letter of apology shows the court that you realise the seriousness of your charges and are truly sorry for your actions. ( because they demonstrated your profound ignorance of the law)
There is no magic formula to writing a letter of apology. It should be from your heart, so a lawyer can only guide you generally.
However, here are a few basic tips:
Address the letter to ‘Your Honour’. (unless his name is Rupert)
Make sure it’s typed or that your handwriting is very neat. ( get a journo from the Australian to do it for you)
Make sure it’s signed and dated. (ensure the date is post Magna Carta A.D1215)
Say why you’re writing the letter eg: ‘I am writing this letter to express my sincere remorse for my irresponsible (stupid) and dangerous actions’.
Accept full responsibility eg: ‘There was no excuse for my actions and I accept full responsibility for what I’ve done’.
Say something about yourself, eg ‘I’ve worked hard for many years and never been in trouble with police. I’m a family man with two young children and would never want to be a bad influence on them. I recognise I have been a bad role model through my conduct’.
Say something about your arrest, eg ‘I was arrested in front of my friends and family, which was humiliating. I had to tell my wife about this and face her disappointment’. (and it may affect my parliamentary pension and ancillary perks)
Say something about steps you’ve taken since the offence eg ‘Since this incident, I have (spoken to my counselor, psychologist) or (undertaken research) or (undertaken the Traffic Offender Program, or studied law properly) and I have come to understand the impact upon the community of my decision to (buy drugs, or drink drive or being stupid) and the danger to which I exposed myself and others’.

Lord Rupert. Wrote the book of Murdoch. Compulsory text for all Coalition ministers.